Year 14 of grief…that’s a lot of time and energy, a countless amount of tears, many sleepless nights and tremendous heartache to this day. When does grief end?
I have experienced grief is often like a maze, full of twists and turns, and hard to find the end. You will run into dead ends, turn a corner, make some headway, and then hit another dead end.
The love we feel doesn’t end with the death of our loved one. The boundaries of life and death don’t affect our feelings of love. It isn’t a switch that can be turned off, just like that. The love I have for Parker and Haley will always be present no matter how much time has gone by.
As believers, we know that a much better day is coming when God himself will wipe every tear from our eyes. On that day “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” Revelation 21:4
So, today I pour out my heart to the Lord and tell Him all that grieves me. I ask Him for His healing touch and the ability to look at my pain with the right perspective. In addition to looking to God and His Word for comfort and perspective, we should share our pain with our brothers and sisters in Christ. Fellow believers have the ability to “mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12:15). When we share our stories with God and others, our grief is weakened. Jesus says to us, “Place who you are and all that you have in My hands. Your broken life. Your story. Your fragility and failure, your pain and distress. Put it in My hands. You’ll be astonished what I can do with it.”
After 14 years…I’m still trusting God with my grief and my story. I’m placing everything in His hands. He is still teaching me new things each year, each month, each day. He is still showing me how to love my family and others just as Jesus would love them. He is still healing my hurt each year. He is, and always will, be there for me and I’m forever grateful for that promise.
The road map of grief will never end this side of heaven. I know many others who deal with grief in their life and we all handle and process it in different ways. If you are one of those who has to deal with grief and the loss of a loved one, invite God to be a part of your journey. I have and He is the only reason I’m able to navigate all of the emotions that come with grief. “All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.” 2 Corinthians 1:3
I’ll end by sharing a few photos of Parker and Haley. They were God’s before they were mine but that doesn’t change how much I truly do miss them.
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Until next time…